October 2010
51 posts
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half my life
11 years.. that’s how long I’ve been chasing the wind.
I can feel it, I know it’s there. Sometimes I see it and before I know it, it passes me.
So many times I tried to catch it, contain it but it is impossible.
The wind is too fast, too strong, too fluid. It’s constantly moving, finding new terrains.
Yet it is gentle and it envelops me in its embrace.
Maybe, maybe one...
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“I can’t believe he rejected me. Who would ever reject me?!”
– Zaphs Zhang, the girl who would never accept “no” for an answer.
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there is nothing I need more than Him
I’ve been running away again.. that’s what I’ve doing.
I’ve been trying to be the ruler of my life.. thinking I can find the solutions to my problems and plug that emptiness within me. In the end, it’s still a God-shaped hole.
I don’t need all the things/people I think I need. I am not in need.
For God shall supply all of my needs; I will lack nothing as I...
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equals.
My partner has to be someone who can walk beside me or before me. Someone who can walk with me or pull me along in life. I am done carrying dead-weights. I am done turning back. I want to stop having to brace the wind and the cold on my own.
I want a mentor. Someone I can look up to or admire. Complementary. Someone who can teach me something about life beyond what I already know. Someone...
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“I just need to know that someone out there listens and understands and doesn’t...”
– my cousin
hey man.. you know I listen and I try to understand and I definitely don’t sleep with people even if I could have. lol.. I EXIST!
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pretend
you are a child, you are young. you think you’ve seen the world. but your years have just begun. and now your heart’s out of control and you think it’s love. I have to grab your heart with a padded glove. because you’re letting it wander too far in the wrong direction. and I am not here to be a distraction.
let us pretend you don’t feel that way or you might think I...
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Grenade
Easy come Easy go That’s just how you live oh Take take take it all But you never give, Should of known you were trouble From the first kiss had your eyes wide open, Why were they open? Gave you all I had And you tossed it in the trash, You tossed it in the trash, you did. To give me all your love is all I ever asked cause what you don’t understand, is id catch a grenade for ya. Throw...
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Perth!
I am back from Perth! Whilst 4 days might seem rather short for a holiday, I think this time round, it was just right.
I really liked it there. It felt like I was home. Lee and kate made me feel like family. It was nice doing stuff together. Grocery shopping, cooking, cleaning and watching TV. I liked being apart of their lives and finally getting glimpse of what Lee’s life is like away...
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this is why I'm here
Pencil: I'm sorry
Eraser: For what? You didn't do anything wrong.
Pencil: I'm sorry cos you get hurt bcos of me. Whenever I made a mistake, you're always there to erase it. But as you make my mistakes vanish, you lose a part of yourself. You get smaller and smaller each time.
Eraser: That's true. But I don't really mind. You see, I was made to do this. I was made to help you whenever you do something wrong. Even though one day, I know I'll be gone and you'll replace me with a new one, I'm actually happy with my job. So please, stop worrying. I hate seeing you sad. :)
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WatchI made an LED THROWIE! =D
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Things to do today.
1) Pack my room. (It looks like a hurricane lindis ran through it)
2) Complete and tidy up my log book.
3) Draft my SIP report brief (see if there are more pictures I should take)
4) Re-organise my packing list for Perth
5) Start packing!
and before all that.. sort out my tummy ache and exercise.
note to self: pizza and beer as supper fodder does not agree with my stomach.
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“Yes it is. I want you to be happy. More than anything else I wanted to be the...”
– Heck, Imagine Me & You (2005)
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when a tornado meets a volcano
I’ve put up with your bad behaviour for months now.
I thought you would have some decency to do something about it but clearly you don’t think our friendship, me, I am worth your time.
I did my best as a friend and I honoured you and our friendship. I cared.
You said you cared. You said I meant a lot to you. That I was special.. our friendship was special. Surely you haven’t...
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snail's pace
I guess I need more to sustain my interest.
This is getting boooooring and mundane..
Don’t patronise me if you aren’t interested.. I have better things to do in life.
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Falling away with you
I can’t remember when it was good moments of happiness elude maybe I just misunderstood all of the love we left behind watching the flash backs intertwine memories I will never find so I’ll love whatever you become and forget the reckless things we’ve done I think our lives have just begun I think our lives have just begun and I’ll feel my world crumbling, and...
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“Teach not thy lip such scorn, for it was made
For kissing, lady, not for such...”
– William Shakespeare
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“Anyone can be passionate, but it takes real lovers to be silly.”
– Rose Franken
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“When you start to know someone, all their physical characteristics start to...”
– Lisa Unger, Beautiful Lies (via kari-shma) (via quote-book)
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good gone bad
I don’t think I am as much of a gentleman I used to be.
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you leave me breathless
I think about you all the time but every time I meet you, you never fail blow my mind.
I know stunning you are and sometimes I wonder if I make it up in my head, but each time I see you, you take my breath away.
The way your eyes sparkle, your laugh, the way your hair falls across your shoulders and the way your lips curl up to a smile.
Your skin, the curve of your neck, your hips, your ass...
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“Learning to let go should be learned before learning to get. Life should be...”
– Ray Bradbury (via kari-shma) (via quote-book)
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“We come to love not by finding the perfect person, but by learning to see an...”
– Angelina Jolie (via kari-shma) (via quote-book)
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go. going. gone.
I take life seriously.. and that seems to be a problem to the other twenty year olds around me. I think I am suppose to be careless, irresponsible, emotional, impulsive, make foolish mistakes, love hard, hurt bad, cry hard. I am suppose to be free and not have a care. Be concerned with my own happiness and mine alone. But I am not all that.
And I am also no longer the person I used to be. No...
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girl from my dreams.
Jane Doe. I don’t even know you, But I know fo’ sho’. That you are beautiful So baby let me know Your name. Damn what’s her name? Cause I’m overly attracted And terribly convinced that she could be my princess And I could be her prince. And I felt that way, since Since I saw Jane Doe. Jane Doe. I don’t think I know you, But I know fo’...
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“It was not one of those strong, impulsive feelings that can hit two people like...”
– The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle by Haruki Murakami (via kari-shma) (via quote-book)
That is how I like my relationships to be like..
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“Don’t ask “do you want to make out?”, say “I really want...”
– the lady who seems to wrap herself around my brain.
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sexiest groove ever!
I’m taking a moment...
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“Instead of England’s early Sunday dinner, a postchurch ordeal of heavy...”
– Guy Beringer, “Brunch: A Plea,” Hunter’s Weekly, 1895
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I should go read a book.
For the past couple of weeks I have spent a significant amount of time obsessing with my phone and my laptop. Because I was happy knowing I made new friends and I have renewed and strengthen my connection with my other friends overseas.
Then recently I recieved a reality check. A virtual life is not really a life.
I am missing out on quality time with things and people around me and myself.
So...
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where will the roads take us?
my stomach’s in a whirl and you told me to take a chance. a friend, a dance. let’s tango tonight hand in hand.
you had no idea it was you the one I was into and you said take the plunge I lunged.. and you stepped away.
into the arms of someone else oh how I wish I could hide it wasn’t pride.. A bit of me had died inside.
And so I said, I’d wait.
It’s too late to...
